Kiss My Eyes, Lay Me To Sleep  Oneshot 3 & 4
by KHarmony
Summary: I promise to depart, just promise one thing. Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep...  Set during All Hell Breaks Loose part 1 & 2
1. Lay Me To Sleep

I've been working on writing a one-shot once a week with themes for each being supplied from friends (and now that it's on FF, reviewers too). Because of my current obsession with Supernatural the first 3 weeks fall into Supernatural fanfic. All the shots are numbered (even when they aren't supernatural based). When I reach each interval of 25 shots the person who gave me the theme for the 25th one shot in the set, will get to make a special writing request from me (within reason please).

This is the third shot. It's based entirely on the season 2 finale All Hell Breaks Loose part 1 and there is a second shot #4 that is based on All Hell Breaks Loose Part 2). It's also a song-fic using the lyrics from AFI's Prelude 12/21. I'm honestly not as happy with part 1 as I am with part 2.

Shot #3: Lay Me To Sleep

Date completed: Tues Oct. 5th 2010

Word count: 401

_This is what I brought you, this you can keep. _

_This is what I brought, you may forget me._

_I promise to depart, just promise one thing. _

_Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep._

I've brought you only pain and sorrow. I'm sorry for all the suffering I put you through. But you still kept me by your side no matter how much of a pain in the ass I was. You looked out for me, protected, and comforted me. For what it's worth, I never regretted anything that has happened to us. Leaving school, traveling with you, the pranks, shitty motel rooms, everything is a precious memory for me.

You always thought I was too emotional and clichéd for your macho bravado. But I'm sad to say that my life did flash through my mind as I felt the searing pain in my lower back. A knife of fire going right through me and I think my spinal cord too, because my legs turned into limp noodles almost instantly. My world slowed to a standstill. I could hear your voice though; see your face in my mind. When I fell into your strong arms I wanted to say so much. But most of all I wanted to tell you I was sorry.

Your voice was faint but I heard you telling me I'd be ok, that it wasn't that bad, that it was your job to look after me, and you'd get me patched up. But I knew the truth. I could feel it, feel my life leaving me through the no doubt, gapping, hole in my back. There was no sugar coating it, I was going to leave you. Leaving you behind to continue fighting without me broke my heart. I only could wish you'd carry on. You might even forget me someday, maybe even settle down eventually and give up the family business in exchange for an apple pie life, with a wife and some kids and a white picket fence. I just wanted to make you promise not to try to save me, to bring me back. Just promise to lay me to rest and move on. That's all I want for you. As my eyes closed, I wished for nothing more than to take away all the pain I was about to cause you. I heard you scream my name as my world ended.

"SAAAM!"


	2. Kiss My Eyes

Second part of these interlinked one shots.

Shot #4: Kiss My Eyes

Date completed: Sun Oct. 10th 2010

Word count: 1,001

_This is what I thought, I thought you'd need me.  
This is what I thought, so think me naive  
I'd promised you my heart, you'd promise to keep.  
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep._

"Dean, you have to think about burying Sam."

"No!" I couldn't even consider that. And no way was I going to give him a hunter's funeral pyre either. I couldn't just let him go. There has to be something I can do. Something to bring him back…

"Something big is coming. End of the world big."

"I've given up enough. So if the world is going to end, THEN LET IT END! Cause' I'm done." I hated yelling at Bobby, who was like a second father to me. I hated even more that I had to throw him out so I could be alone. My entire family was gone now. My precious brother who meant everything in the world to me was lying on a bed still as stone, his heart silenced. If the world ended that'd be quite fine by me because as far as I was concerned my world was over.

I sat down next to your motionless body. I'd been staring at you just loosing track of time. I'd cried more times then I'd ever care to admit. Wishing for a miracle, for you to suddenly sit up and be just fine. My annoying little brother again, alive and well.

"I was trying to protect you. To keep you safe. It was always my responsibility, ya know." It was my purpose on this god forsaken planet to watch out for you, whether Dad told me to or not. I thought about all the years I'd spent throughout our childhood, looking out for you. Protecting you, both from the stupid shit in this world, and the monsters I knew were lurking. I thought you needed me. That I had to be the one, who was always there for you. Even after I picked you up from college and we started hunting together, I knew… "I had one job… one job… and I screwed it up."

Maybe I was naïve. Thinking I could protect you from everything. I couldn't put you in an impenetrable bubble after all. But I was certainly going to try and be the best big brother I possibly could. But… "I blew it," I mumbled and then looked at my baby brother's corpse, "and for that I'm sorry." I bowed my head and here came the waterworks again. Dammit all! I just couldn't stop the tears flowing from my eyes. I wasn't into this emotional crap. That was your department. But without you, I feel lost and alone. I was such a screw up to let you get taken out of my sight like that. I mean if I'd found you sooner, maybe I could have helped you. I should have been able to stop that bastard from knifing you in the back.

"I guess it's what I do, let down the people I love. I let Dad down…" He gave his life for mine because I wasn't strong enough. I was dying not because of any monster attack, but from a friggen car accident! "And now I guess I'm supposed to just let you down too. How can I?" I looked up and knew if I could see my face it would read hopeless and angry. "How am I supposed to live with that? What am I supposed to do? Sammy?"

Sammy always had the answers. He knew everything and I wished now he could give me the answer I so desperately needed. I thought about what Bobby had said about the world possibly ending and thought again that with you dead, I'd welcome dying to be with you…you, and Dad, and Mom. "What am I supposed to do!" I stood from my seat angry and shouting and wanting to smash something to pieces. Namely, I wanted to kick my own ass because this was all my fault. I couldn't do anything by myself.

I can't live without you Sammy, I can't go on like this. I have to bring you back no matter what the cost. A lightbulb was beginning to flicker to life in my brain. A spark of hope. A year ago, I had lain dying in a hospital bed and miraculously was cured. That was when Dad gave his life, his very soul to a crossroads demon in exchange for my life. I don't care what it takes Sammy, I'll give my life, my soul, my beating heart for you, if that's what it takes to see you alive again.

With my crazy ass plan in mind, I moved and leaned over the bed, leaning down to your body and placed a kiss over both your closed eyelids. If this didn't work, if the demon bitch wouldn't bargain with me, then my next plan was to drive the Impala over the highest cliff face I could find. I'd see you again, one way or another. "Sleep Sammy, I'll be back for you soon."

With that I tore out of the abandoned house and got into the Impala. Driving with reckless abandon, like the complete madman I was, I went to the nearest crossroads. I made a desperate plea to a demon I wanted nothing more than to put a bullet through. I sold her my soul. I would get one more year to watch over and protect my little brother. One more year and then I'd have to leave you. As selfish as it was, I was willing to put you into my current position, regardless of the pain it causes you. Because right now, I couldn't stand the feeling of my empty heart and my guilt riddled soul. It was poetic justice that I would soon pay for my crimes in the dark pits of Hell. In just one year Sammy, you'll have to promise to…  
_Kiss my eyes and lay me to… _

_Sleep_


End file.
